A New Beginning

Where are you going?

2012

03Dec2012

Dumb Ways to Die, #725

  • bf
Furgin:

(In WoW) Who wants to try a challenge mode?

Various people:

Yeah! Sure! We’re more geared now, we won’t die on the first pull like last time.

The group forms and enters the instance.

First trash pull, Atlassia is tanking. There’s a lot of damage being taken but it’s definitely easier than the last time the guild tried a Challenge mode. Furgin dies but the first trash group is successfully cleared.

While Furgin is being rezzed…

Confluence:

Who’s healing?

Atlassia:

*looks around and sees a warrior, a rogue, a hunter and a warlock*

Mehemet:

Umm…

Atlassia:

Err…

Mavenancer:

Umm…

Confluence:

Rofl!

Furgin:

WE WILL NEVER SPEAK OF THIS AGAIN.

20Nov2012

Turnips, Slappybag.

  • bf
Furgin:

WTB [White Turnip] x 1000

Furgin:

lol these are all the guys that I have been threatening for money.

Atlassia:

I’ll see if I have any.

Furgin:

Woot, I need 40K.

Atlassia:

Not money, turnips.

Furgin:

That’s not my name.

Atlassia:

I’ve just posted you 70 turnips, turnips.

20Nov2012

007, License to Build

  • bf
Jirra:

Having people waiting around for builds to run isn’t that efficient either, I wonder why we don’t buy more agents?

Swoon:

We are pretty much at the concurrent agent limit already.

Jirra:

What if we buy… secret agents?

Swoon:

On Her Manager’s Selenium Service

clepetit:

Never Say Maven

Jirra:

Confluence Never Dies

Swoon:

You Only Test Twice

virtualwolf:

The Man With The Golden Build

clepetit:

From Support, With Love

Jirra:

The Customer Who Loved Me (We may have a DFTC issue there though)

clepetit:

Stable APIs are Forever

Jirra:

AtlasEye

clepetit:

The User Count Is Not Enough

jedi:

Quantum of flaky tests

clepetit:

DoS Royale

jedi:

Octomergepussy

Swoon:

The front company is Universal Test Ports

Jirra:

For Your Builds Only

Carlfish:

On Her Majesty’s Secret Wiki

clepetit:

Document Another Day

20Nov2012

Rise of the Desserts

  • bf
dennilan:

lolzcat: you want jira-release-alacarte

* Swoon

imagines sitting in a fancy restaurant ordering our products a la carte.

Swoon:

“Hmm, I’ll have the JIRA 10 Users to start.”

Swoon:

“Oh, excellent choice, sir”.

* Jirra

prefers the OnDemand Mystic Buffet

Swoon:

Your pathetic platform betraaaaaays you!

20Nov2012
  • bf

<p>I wouldn’t be a good Star Trek captain, I’m too risk-averse.</p> <p>“There’s a funny sensor reading? WARP THE HELL OUT OF HERE, WE CAN SEND A PROBE BACK LATER” </p> <p>“WE HAVE 1000 CIVILIANS ON THIS SHIP WHY THE HELL ARE WE HERE”</p>

Jirra-Luc Picard
20Nov2012

Nerf Druids

  • bf
jedi:

If druids get any more utility I am going to eat my hat in protest.

dave:

Careful, that hat might be a druid.

12Nov2012

♫ Tanks for the memories… ♫

  • bf
Carlfish:

I think I'm supposed to be going to karaoke tonight.

Jirra:

You can't karaoke on raid night.

Carlfish:

I can always sing on Vent.

Swoon:

Woooooaah, we're half way there. Wooooaaah, raidin' with a bear!

25Sept2012
  • bf

Pantsless Carlfish are majestic and not at all off-putting.

Carlfish, of course
25Sept2012

Singalong

  • bf
dennilan:

Jirra and jedi sitting in a tree…

Jirra:

T - E - S - T - I - N - G

25Sept2012
  • bf

MY BNRAIN IS NOT TODAY

Furgin still doesn’t stack +int
07Sept2012

Apparently, it was lonely.

  • bf
MeliaeGames:

4ety65]=]\98;l[pk-===7 o=\=\\\\\]=sssssssssssssssa8777777777777rtty98gfyyyyyyy7yttttgfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

clepetit:

hi Mel’s cat!

30Aug2012

Rogues vs Druids

  • bf
Jirra:

We cut the bark off the side of one tree and covered it in undiluted herbicide, it was fun

Carlfish:

“How to kill a druid”

lolzcat:

hang on, druids in tree form can cure poison

Jirra:

Oh no!

lolzcat:

you should have put a bleed effect on them instead

Carlfish:

[Sap]

30Aug2012
  • bf

Naked arena is more fun.

Jirra. Because who needs context?
24Aug2012

Collectors Edition

  • bf
Wobin:

Pet and mount for $20

hinch:

That's pretty cheap. I'm sure you could charge more for those kinds of services.

23Aug2012
  • bf

I wasn’t sure what the socially acceptable behaviour in an almost empty theatre was. Is two other people enough to force me to put my pants on?

Furgin, Prince of Etiquette.
13Aug2012
  • bf
Jirra:

Hey furgin, can you place your votes for the MC competition when you have a moment please?

Jirra:

that's not MasterChef, by the way.

Carlfish:

Damn, so my creeper salad won't be accepted?

Jirra:

It's a taste explosion!

13Aug2012
  • bf

<p>Newsflash: cooking is boring. I’m part of the raw food movement, where I only eat uncooked food.</p> <p>Like sashimi or tables.</p>

Jedi explains his food-preparation technique
30Jul2012
  • bf

For my ShipIt project, I’m going to trip major balls for four days.

Hinch has my vote.
24Jul2012
  • bf

dennilan has never lost his furginity

24Jul2012
  • bf

I’m not interested in your problems, I’m talking about MY problems.

clepetit neatly summarises his personality
24Jul2012
  • bf

Help! I am on fire! #000

Carlfish, demonstrating life without a home phone
16Jul2012

Meanwhile, in Minecraft…

  • bf
Furgin:

(Building a space ship) Damn you, spawning on the roof. There are skeletons all through my ship!

Jirra:

So, you have a crew.

Furgin:

Only a skeleton crew.

16Jul2012

What do we want? More in-jokes! (#2)

  • bf
Jirra:

What do we want?

Jirra:

Performance!

Jirra:

When do we want it?

Jirra:

…………… ……………… ……………… ………… …………………… ……………… ……

Jirra:

…… …………… …………… …………… ………… ………… …………… …… ……………

Jirra:

Now!

16Jul2012

Asterix and the Field Level Permissions

  • bf
Carlfish:

dennilan is the Bug Sorting Hat

dennilan:

I sort them into warranty bugs, edalgliesh, and closewontfix

Carlfish:

TEN POINTS FOR CLOSEWONTFIX!

Jirra:

That sounds like an Asterix character

Carlfish:

Closewontfix fell into a cauldron of magic potion as a child, and is now invincible.

03Jul2012

Heredue

  • bf
ExcaliburStrike:

What IS this heredue btw?

Jirra:

Heredue is the word, it's the word that you heard, it's got groove, it's got meaning. Heredue is the time, is the place is the motion, heredue is the way we are feeling.

Carlfish:

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was Heredue.

Swoon:

Then the Word changed to be a standards-based XML format.

Jirra:

Hereduex.

27Jun2012
  • bf

This channel is bad for me. Someone on the Confluence Dev channel said “Stable is not compiling”, and I was halfway into typing “Your mum is not compiling” before I realised it wasn’t the right place for it.

Carlfish
25Jun2012

I find your lack of PermGen… disturbing

  • bf
Jedi:

[SW:TOR patch] 1.3 is dropping on Tuesday

Forceclip:

I should call in sick is what you’re saying, Jedi?

Jirra:

Call in Sith?

Forceclip:

Good idea

Jirra:

“Sorry, can’t come in today, I feel the pull of the dark side”

Forceclip:

“My JIRA instance crashed” “YOU HAVE FAILED ME FOR THE LAST TIME, CUSTOMER”

25Jun2012

We’ve created a monster…

  • bf
dennilan:

Wikipedia seems to think Rubella is mainly only bad if you’re pregnant.

Jirra:

Is dennilan pregnant? Congratulations!

Carlfish:

Congratulations denni.

Carlfish:

When are you expecting?

dennilan:

Wrong question. You should be asking “what”.

21Jun2012

Meanwhile, on SWTOR

  • bf
Stish (Jirra):

My husband keeps sending me companion gifts

Raxor (Furgin):

You got married?

Stish:

Well, I guess fiance. He asked but I don't think we had a wedding. Unless I was logged out at the time.

Raxor:

So romantic. “Sorry I missed the wedding, I was logged out.”

Raxor:

I WANT THAT ON A TSHIRT.

14Jun2012
  • bf

So MCB had the decency to let me know that my IAN all-hands file name IANALHANDS was not appropriate for a title of a presentation.

Furgin
13Jun2012

Call of the Common Cold

  • bf
* Carlfish

wonders if he should add the possible rise of Cthulhu to this spreadsheet of potential company risks.

Carlfish:

Likely business impact: MADNESS! MADNESS AND TENTACLES!

dennilan:

Carlfish: remember, the universe tends towards maximum irony.

Carlfish:

So whatever I list in this spreadsheet is more likely to happen? Uh oh.

dennilan:

No, anything you list in the spreadsheet which is not subsequently *planned for* is likely to happen

dennilan:

Awesome if you *want* Cthulhu to awaken from his watery dreams.

Carlfish:

Maybe I do.

Carlfish:

Muahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahaha

virtualwolf:

Ph’nglui mglw’nafh C’thulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!

Carlfish:

Bless you.

04Jun2012

The pathos is overwhelming.

  • bf
furgin:

Do you say make sure something is ON the path, or IN the path?

Meliae:

It depends on the context.

furgin:

Make sure java and javac are on the path.

furgin:

Make sure java and javac are in the path.

jedi:

Make sure java and javac are pathy.

Jirra:

jedi: I think the word is “pathetic”.

04Jun2012
  • bf

<p>Am I a morally deficient person for thinking cannibalism isn’t a bad thing if the person died of unrelated causes?</p> <p>I mean, they were developers, I was going to kill them anyway.</p>

Jirra, now legally required to sit under a sign reading “Beware of the QA”
30May2012

Eight arms to hold you

  • bf
Jirra:

\o/

furgin:

\\o/

lolzcat:

Furgin grew an extra arm!

furgin:

\\\o///

Virtualwolf:

GANESHA IS PLEASED

Wobin:

Actually no, that would be \\\Q///

17May2012
  • bf

Going to Vella Nero with gilgad, saying your name is Batman, and hearing them announce coffee for “Batman and Rob”? Priceless.

dennilan
15May2012
  • bf

<p>Facebook thinks I’m a single lesbian planning my dream wedding… and looking to purchase JIRA.</p> <p>Presumably I’m going to use JIRA to organise the wedding.</p>

Jirra
15May2012

A New Joke Beginning…

  • bf
hinch:

You have to get up before the sun to get to work if you live in Penriff.

Jirra:

But that… that’s while it’s dark. That’s not a valid waking up time.

Jirra:

InvalidWakeUpTimeException

lolzcat:

Is that a HibernateException?

15May2012

The Furgin’s Apprentice

  • bf
Carlfish:

The best way to get a new tester is to chop them in half. Then you’ll have two testers, each with their own pair of buckets…

Furgin:

If we did that to developers we could write 2x as much code!

Furgin:

Damn. I should be CEO of a software startup.

Furgin:

You want to pair program? Sure? Let me get my axe.

15May2012

Armydillo

  • bf
Wobin:

I thought it mattered for the RMAH

Meliae:

RMAH?

Wobin:

Real Money Auction House

Swoon:

Royal Military Armadillo Hospital

Wobin:

Those poor armadillos

Wobin:

fired out of cannons =(

Swoon:

That’s what they signed up for when they became military armadillos.

Swoon:

They knew the risks.

14May2012

Dance like everybody’s watching.

  • bf
* Jirra

does the “This is totally more complicated than I was anticipating” dance.

dennilan:

The “This is totally more complicated than I was anticipating” dance is a jive, right?

Jirra:

I’m not sure. Whenever I’ve tried to learn the dance, it’s turned out to be more complex than I anticipated.

07May2012
  • bf

You’ll need tougher balls, because you’re an adult now and therefore more likely to crush one.

Sage advice from dennilan.
07May2012

He has a point…

  • bf
lolzcat:

hahaha: http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20593325,00.html

[“Justin Bieber Escorts Floyd Mayweather to the Ring in Las Vegas” - ed]

lolzcat:

If you were a pro-boxer, would you want Bieber escorting you to the ring for a fight?

dave:

If someone was going to stab me, I'd want Bieber in the way.

24Apr2012
  • bf
Carlfish:

I bought a TIE Fighter Convertible. And painted it red.

Jirra:

Mid-life crisis?

18Apr2012
  • bf
Jirra:

I had back-to-back triage meetings this afternoon. Brain hurts now.

* zennilan

comforts Jirra

* Jirra

triages zennilan

* zennilan

is split into three pieces

* Jirra

resolves zennilan as "Duplicate"

12Apr2012

Everything has a downside

  • bf
Wobin:

You know the phrase: “God helps those who help themselves”?

Jirra:

Am I God?

Wobin:

In this sense, yes.

Jirra:

Awesome.

* Wobin

congratulates Jirra on her promotion

Jirra:

Oh damn, think how many performance reviews I’ll have to do.

12Apr2012
  • bf

Your password can only be 6 characters, contain the word “poop” and two numbers that are limited to the range between 4 and 6.

Furgin, resetting his ADP password
23Mar2012

Kungaloosh

  • bf
lolzcat:

Now I feel like a cider.

virtualwolf:

I'm drinking a +46

lolzcat:

Which stat does that give you +46 to?

jedi:

Inebriety.

23Mar2012

A rose by any other name…

  • bf
slappybag:

We tried playing that scary game together - she kept getting motion sick.

Wobin:

Amnesia?

slappybag:

Yeah. I couldn’t think of the name.

23Mar2012
  • bf

I went to the red light district, but the ladies in the Amsterdam windows won’t play Magic: The Gathering for money.

clepetit discovers the only drug you <em>can’t</em> get in Amsterdam.
14Mar2012
  • bf

I kind of considered the mass incestuous orgy the shark-jumping point.

Wobin
08Mar2012

ANB tries out the new acquisition.

  • bf
Jirra:

I have to get someone to add me to HipChat, and I can't find out who.

lolzcat:

I can add you.

Jirra:

Woot!

lolzcat:

I'll need you to link achievement and ilevel first.

Jirra:

I… my HipChat achievement is on an alt.

07Mar2012

QA Talent Trees

  • bf
Carlfish:

I still haven’t managed to solo that damn boss.

Jirra:

Carlfish: would it help if we all buffed you before you went in?

Carlfish:

It would help more if I were better at Subtlety spec.

Jirra:

I can’t help you there. QA doesn’t have a subtlety spec.

Carlfish:

QA specs Destruction. Every time.

Swoon:

or Assassination

Jirra:

Retribution

Carlfish:

[Rebuke]

Swoon:

SILENCE, DARK FEATURE!

05Mar2012

Bonestorm II: Marrowgar’s Revenge

  • bf
*** Signoff: dennilan (Ping timeout: 252 seconds)
*** Signoff: fullets (Ping timeout: 252 seconds)
*** Signoff: furgin (Ping timeout: 265 seconds)
*** Signoff: slappybag (Ping timeout: 252 seconds)
*** furgin has joined channel #anb
furgin:

apparently we were all running off one power board

01Mar2012

The Internet is for Issues

  • bf
Jirra:

http://www.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/03/app-store-quality/

Jirra:

Now I want to know, why are there no sex JIRA plugins for us to reject?

Carlfish:

We obviously aren’t properly stimulating our development community.

* Jirra

tries to think of “sex-tinged” plugin ideas for FedEx

Swoon:

“To Do”

01Mar2012

Twilight 2000

  • bf
Carlfish:

Edward is so dreamy.

dennilan:

Bad luck buddy, he breaks the divide-by-2-and-add-7 rule.

Carlfish:

That never stopped Buffy and Angel

dennilan:

YOU'RE NOT STEALING EDWARD FROM ME!!!!!!!

Carlfish:

HE ONLY SPARKLES FOR ME!

16Feb2012

I'm Feeling Lucky

  • bf
Carlfish:

I like that if you scroll down three lines in that search, there's a totally random picture of naked women.

dennilan:

You get that for any search.

Carlfish:

Not on MY Internet!

dennilan:

On your Internet it's the first result?

jedi:

Some people have safe search on. Some people have it off. I have it set to 'unsafe only'.

dennilan:

I run each search twice - with safe and unsafe on, then filter out anything that shows up in both.

hinch:

Sounds like a good Fedex idea.

16Feb2012

Slash Friction

  • bf
dennilan:

Carlfish: how does Connie being female make it technically not slash?

Carlfish:

Slash is, by definition, gay fanfic.

• Jirra ‘s day has improved since pairing with Graeme and chrisdarroch

Carlfish:

That’s not slash either.

Wobin:

Jirra: Isn’t that a threesome?

Jirra:

Wobin: Not at the same time

Wobin:

jirra gets around

Carlfish:

It’s important that QA tries everything to see if it works.

Jirra:

People are always talking about us giving things “QA love”

11Jan2012

By our powers combined!

  • bf
nathan-022:

Jirra: Your reputation precedes you. Yesterday during the planning meeting we were creating an issue for writing functional tests and a note was added, “Think like a Penny”.

Jirra:

Haha, awesome.

dennilan:

Think like a Penny, work like a Fede, enthuse like a Zhuang…

Jirra:

…be diligent like a Panna, fight like a Veenu.

jedi:

Earth, fire, wind, water, heart…

jedi:

GO QA!